Fearless Blog

I don’t have much time to write because I am BUSY recruiting teams and individuals for Cycle for Survival 2010 (cycleforsurvival.org). If you are reading this email and have not already signed up to captain or participate on a team, you have no right to be here!!
I wanted to briefly share with you a wonderfully touching and inspiring experience I had the other day. I went to the hospital to meet with a man who has been battling a rare cancer. This man received the sobering news that the chemo regimen he has been on for the past few months does not seem to be working as well as the Doctors had hoped. HOWEVER, he received some much-needed hope…rather than be told that there are no other treatment options to try, he is being put in a clinical trial for a new treatment, which is being funded by the money we raised from last year’s Cycle for Survival
I will not share his name to protect his privacy but these …

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I absolutely love Arizona. I find the dry heat, the constant sun and the focus on health and well-being to be so energizing for me. I have always loved Scottsdale but over the past few years I have developed a very close, almost spiritual connection with this town. Since I started battling cancer in 2004, I have come to Scottsdale at least 1x a year for some R&R.; It’s amazing how much more energy I feel here! Even when I have been actively on treatment, I miraculously find so much more energy when I visit and feel so much more alive.

The irony is that I was in Arizona at a wedding when I felt my first cancer symptoms 5 years ago (Dave and I were playing tennis and I had to stop because I had sharp pains in my abdomen). I truly believe that I understand my body better when I am here. I eat well, I sleep great and I work out like crazy.

The past few days have been …

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My dear friend Meg passed away yesterday. Fortunately, I was able to visit the hospital and tell her how profound of an influence she had on my life before she passed. I pray that she heard me.
This is my favorite picture of Meg although you can’t see her. She is the one with her back to the camera being hugged. Meg was such a powerful force that you couldn’t resist wanting to hug her and be a part of her aura.
The year was 2005 and she had just ridden cross-country with Lance Armstrong to raise awareness for cancer research. While she was riding in the Tour of Hope, I was in a hospital bed receiving my first round of chemotherapy. I was so scared and had no way to know how to handle what was ahead of me. Meg and I had not yet met but she sent me pictures and emails offering hope and guidance from every state she visited on her cancer tour.
Immediately after she returned, she …

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It seems very appropriate that on the week I find out that my 5 month CT scan is clean (yippee!), we have launched the 2010 Cycle for Survival website. Both are milestones that I credit with saving my life: the CT scans are proof that I continue to thrive physically and the Cycle event I credit with my emotional survival.

Please check out cycleforsurvival.org and sign up a bike today! The MSKCC team has done a FANTASTIC job and the website is more beautiful and easier to navigate than ever. This year will be bigger and better than ever before…2 states, 3 official locations and over 500 teams will cycle for a cure. Any questions, please email me. I would love to have all of you there.

The event got some great press in Duke’s alumni magazine this month, check it out – jenduke.pdf. And we were on CBS this past Monday AM. Waiting to get the clip and will post that as well.

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Dave and I had a fantastic Labor Day Weekend. I took a few days off from work to “rebalance” and it was just what the doctor ordered. I had a few days to relax and catch up on sleep etc and then our nephews, Ben and Shaun, came and spent the night. We had so much fun going to the Mets vs. Cubs game, playing football in the park, visiting Madam Tussauds, taking a motorboat around NYC and having a pizza eating contest!

Labor Day was our 6 year anniversary! Sometimes it seems like just yesterday but most of the time it feels like Dave and I have been married a lot more than 6 years. We have been through so much together that I feel like we were both very different people when we got married. We had a great day! The weather was beautiful. We slept in and then took a leisurely walk all around Manhattan. We had a 2pm brunch downtown and just spent the day connecting. It …

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My Brain on Chemo: Alive and Alert
Published: August 31, 2009, New York Times

Within the chemotherapy alumni corps there exists a mutual respect not unlike the bond shared by veterans of war. Sometimes that respect is silently conveyed; not everyone wants to talk about it. And sometimes it is shared in the shorthand of the battle-hardened.

Where?

Esophagus.
Who?
Sloan-Kettering.
What kind?
Cisplatin, fluorouracil, Drano,
Borax … .
Side effects?
The usual: nausea, vomiting, hair loss. And the toes are still numb.
Yeah.
At this point the two chemo alums may begin to sense a phantom metallic taste at the back of their throat, a taste sometimes prompted by the intravenous infusion of the corrosive chemicals intended to save their lives. A strong drink might be in order; maybe two.
With that first, taste-altering sip, the two might begin to discuss another side effect that has received attention lately, the one rudely called “chemo brain”: the cognitive fogginess that some patients experience after completing their regimen. That fogginess does not always completely lift, and oncologists are now taking seriously what they might once …

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As many of you know, I have been toying around with the idea of writing a humorous, small book that shares all of the annoying, insensitive or inappropriate things that people have said to me over the past 5 years. The title of the book would be I Know You Mean Well But…because I genuinely believe that people have good intentions. They often get flustered and rather just say something sweet and pure like “I love you and I think it stinks you have to deal with this,” they try to fill the airtime with silly things.
Many of my friends have joked with me over the past few years saying that they are now even more cautious about what they say around me because they don’t want to be in the book. I tell people that although no names will be mentioned, it’s my hope that people “see” themselves in the stories of the book and learn how to be even more supportive and constructive to family members and friends …

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The past few weeks have been jam-packed. I spent a week in California combining business with pleasure. I spent a few days visiting colleagues in Los Angeles and then flew to San Francisco for the weekend to catch up with lots of friends. It was so great to see my friends and meet so many of their children for the first time!

 
This trip marked my first real business travel trip since I recovered from my surgery and it felt great. Although I do notice that traveling takes a lot out of me. When I returned home on t
he following Monday, I slept over 10.5 hours to recover from the jet lag!
I am doing really well. However, I am finding that the hardest part of recovering is finding the perfect balance between “moving forward” and “remembering the past.”One the one hand, I want to move beyond the cancer and jump into new activities both feet forward.On the other hand, I find that I get overwhelmed when I have too much on …

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I just got back from an amazing experience. There is an oceanfront bed & breakfast in Ocean Grove, New Jersey (about 75 minutes from NYC) called Mary’s Place by the Sea. Although the home is named after the Virgin Mary, this home is open to all religious denominations and does not include religion in any of their activities.

The mission of the home is to give women with cancer a place to rest and revive during and after treatment. The staff caters to the needs of every woman as they work through the physical and emotional rigors of their treatment and their individual cancer experiences. Guests may stay a few hours or a few days, if needed. In addition to great food provided by a nutritionist, they provide Reiki massage, guided meditation, yoga and spa services (I got a facial!)

 
Their goal is to provide a home of hope that allows the individual to get well and gain strength to win their battle with cancer. Right now they are “renting space” …

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I just got back from a great weekend at the NJ shore with my girlfriends. For a while now, my friends and I have been discussing a bit of a celebration when I am done with chemo and surgery. We joked around that it is my “sexy back” weekend since now that I am off the juice, I can get back to my fighting form.
We know that it isn’t the real CELEBRATION since my odds are still 50/50 of the cancer coming back over the next few years. However, if the past 4.5 years have taught us anything, it’s that we need to celebrate the daily milestones as opposed to waiting for the big moment.
My friend from high school generously offered his beach house in Long Beach Island for the weekend so off we went. The weather was perfect, the house was gorgeous and the company was divine. I couldn’t have asked for a more wonderful time.
I wouldn’t have made it through the past few years without my friends and …

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