My friend Paul is known for writing great Top 10 Lists. What a nice present to receive this hysterical list in my inbox as I head towards surgery.  I have to laugh now because after tomorrow, laughing will hurt a lot!

 10.  She's tired of explaining to everyone that Sarcoma is a form of cancer, not a type of sarcasm unique to New Jersey natives.

9.  She drops a small fortune on a great looking wig and the paparazzi repeatedly mistake her for Beyonce.

8.  She’s been to chemo so many times she can bake a potato in less than 3 minutes or thaw a frozen turkey in 9 and a half.

7.  Her assistant started a rumor that she's having a midday romp with some guy named Sloan Kettering.

6.  In the last four years, she's gone under the knife twice as many times as the entire cast of Housewives of Orange County, Season 4.

5.  She's been hospitalized so many times, orderlies all over the tri-state area have tagged pictures of her knockers on their MySpace pages.

4.  She's infuriated Hollywood agents by blowing off meetings with SpongeBob, Dora and Linda Ellerbee to go to "treatment" with "Sloan".

3.  She drops a small fortune on a great looking wig and -- on windy days -- senatorial hopefuls mistake her for Governor Blagojevich.

2.  In spite of battling cancer, her gay and single friends still make her organize Cycle for Survival as a way to meet guys in tight bike shorts.

And the Number One Reason Jen is Fed Up with Cancer is:

1.  Her weekly chemo treatments conflict with the exact time she is supposed to be watching 90210!